“I’m not in this world to live up to your expectations and you’re not in this world to live up to mine.”
I always remind myself of this. We expect so much from people we don't even know and vice versa. Why? Now of-course there are times when we are counting on people or close friends and family that we have a high opinion of and in certain circumstances yes you should show a certain version of yourself that people expect.
But the problem is that most people let this mentality feed into everything they do. Their choices, what they wear, where they go for dinner, who they spend time with. The image that people set for themselves, be it that 'musician guy' or the 'gym guy' and now lately the 'business guy' gains them something they are after at first. In most cases it makes them feel secure and valued. But slowly before they know it, they become a prisoner of the image the once sought after so viciously. They feel everything needs to be about their image and maintaining it or 'keeping up with the jones', they must do a gym post or they must do a musical post. Now while thats great to share, if you are doing because you feel thats the only way you get value, than it is completely false and you are chasing something that does not exist, while lying to yourself.
Live up your own standard is and that great thing about that is, you choose your own standard, not others.
But the problem is that most people let this mentality feed into everything they do. Their choices, what they wear, where they go for dinner, who they spend time with. The image that people set for themselves, be it that 'musician guy' or the 'gym guy' and now lately the 'business guy' gains them something they are after at first. In most cases it makes them feel secure and valued. But slowly before they know it, they become a prisoner of the image the once sought after so viciously. They feel everything needs to be about their image and maintaining it or 'keeping up with the jones', they must do a gym post or they must do a musical post. Now while thats great to share, if you are doing because you feel thats the only way you get value, than it is completely false and you are chasing something that does not exist, while lying to yourself.
Live up your own standard is and that great thing about that is, you choose your own standard, not others.
“Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one”
As a whole in modern society we want everything and we don't wanna do much to get it. There is always the 6 minute workout or the 10 steps to financial freedom type of thing out there. We don't focus on mastery, we don't focus on the joys of slow progress. We want immediate gratification and we want it now and there will be this balancing act of going through periods of being focused in a great routine and parts where everything feels like chaos, the trick is reminding yourself on a daily, even hourly basis why you are after what you are after.
It is not easy and with the ever more complex mind of a human you will never get everything right in your understanding. But if you can some build a habit, where everything negative you choose to focus on how it will help and make you stronger, you win. This is not to say you don't feel negative and bad but it means that you are choosing the take ownership of that situation, you are moving forward from it even though your emotions are still there. You get dealt a hand and you have to play that the best you can, life of-course is not that simplistic but sometimes its better for us to simplify things that over intellectualize. The more pain, hardship you feel, the fuller and richer your life in the end. A full life is not one without struggle, I can promise you that. If there were no contrasts of happy and sadness, you would go into a depression wondering if this is all there is. Which happens to many people with extreme amounts of wealth. Feel every emotion.
It is not easy and with the ever more complex mind of a human you will never get everything right in your understanding. But if you can some build a habit, where everything negative you choose to focus on how it will help and make you stronger, you win. This is not to say you don't feel negative and bad but it means that you are choosing the take ownership of that situation, you are moving forward from it even though your emotions are still there. You get dealt a hand and you have to play that the best you can, life of-course is not that simplistic but sometimes its better for us to simplify things that over intellectualize. The more pain, hardship you feel, the fuller and richer your life in the end. A full life is not one without struggle, I can promise you that. If there were no contrasts of happy and sadness, you would go into a depression wondering if this is all there is. Which happens to many people with extreme amounts of wealth. Feel every emotion.
“Be happy, but never satisfied.”
I love this, it highlights for me that we should always seek out to become better and better no matter where we are in life. Not to be poisoned by ambition and this curse of wanting more. But to remember you have what you have, be grateful, but don't let it stop you from becoming better. For the process of self-actualisation is never ending and it does not matter if you begin at 70 years old, or start 12, you have something to strive for. And in the great words of Tony Robbins, progress is the key. Progress on a consistent basis makes us feel alive.